Very recently, I have been put into a situation where I have to make a large decision that not only affects my life but others. For this choice, I am forced to think about my future. When I had thought about it, I was able to pinpoint a feeling. In the following poem, I have exaggerated the feeling into something unrealistic and unachievable, as "everything was beautiful and nothing hurt" is untruthful. Yet, it summarizes what I want to feel in my future: to be in a peaceful state given any situation.
everything was beautiful and nothing hurt.
i can only fantasize of it.
but what is there to fantasize?
i know the exact feeling,
the exact sensations.
but i don't know what would lead me to it
(it being where everything is beautiful and
the feeling would be happy, i think.
the sensations: hard to say/describe.
i just am unsure of how i would get to that climax
would it be a lover?
would it be me?
or maybe not even a person.
would it be closure?
now and then, when i think about it, i can feel a little of the emotion i am
trying to relay to you.
i hope whatever or whoever leads me to that feeling is great,
it ought to be.